Last week when Mila Kunis told Glamour Magazine she would be open to exploring internet dating, the Twittersphere suddenly exploded. Just the idea that such an A-List hottie would consider a regular guy was exciting news for many. Not since Julia Roberts hitched up with Lyle Lovett had so many things suddenly seemed possible. But what is the reality of dating, or better yet, marrying a full-fledged star? Well, that probably depends on the star.
For Matt Damon’s wife (anonymous Miami bartender Luciana Bozan Barroso) it was a true life Prince Charming extravaganza as he repeatedly pursued her heart. For Eminem’s ex-wife (longtime cellmate Kimberley Anne Scott), it involved a handful of lawsuits, a number of hostile songs written about her, and not one – but two divorces. Yeah, they tried it twice.
You have to remember that being a celebrity is hazardous work. There’s a significantly higher likelihood of getting into a fistfight with a photographer. They also carry a higher preponderance of encountering addiction, stalking and Mel Gibson. To legally bind oneself to those risks, you’d have to either really be in love – or really be fulfilling some other need.
It could be psychological – the need to gain attention, if only peripherally. It might be a desire for vanity, power, or wealth. Obviously some celebs do have positive pairings with the un-famous, but in some cases it’s undeniable that individuals specifically seek out a partner with a Wiki page. After all, serial killers have been exchanging vows with pen pals for years. I imagine that’s not too far removed from marrying Howie Mandel.
The sad word is, even in a healthy example like the Matt Damon-model, the trials of fame must still carry a heavy toll. There’s the odd schedules – whether from a long film shoot or a world tour. The idea of being constantly photographed only sounds fun when you’re twelve – and I’m not sure how comfortable I’d be watching my supposed soulmate making out with Jake Gyllenhaal.
Despite all this, some still seek out a famous spouse like a moth to a flashbulb. When Kelsey Grammersplit from wife Camille, he was rather blunt on the subject. He told CNN’s Piers Morgan that she “married me because I was Frasier.” Camille eventually went on to her own lesser level of fame as a cast member on the first two seasons of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
The appeal of having a star on your arm is understandable. Whether people actually fall for the person or the persona they already knew is another matter. It must also be challenging when the star is somewhat infamous. You have to imagine there was some awkwardness when Robert Downey Jr. was first introduced to his future in-laws.
When celebs do wed, it’s frequently with their own kind. Dating is tough enough without having to baby-step someone through their first paparazzi ambush. Gossip Girl’s Chance Crawford admitted to ContactMusic that sometimes he’s limited to starlets.”The pool is smaller because you hang out with five people as opposed to when you’re in college or a job,” he explained. “It might be harder to meet a girl who is not in the industry. I’m open to anything.” When they do hitch up with non-celebs, it’s often with someone who has at least a tangential connection to show business. A press agent, or an executive at a studio. People already somewhat accustomed to fame.
Dating a superstar could be an exciting prospect or a treacherous series of pitfalls. Just ask most professional cheerleaders. Maybe that’s exactly what some stars seek out, someone to cheer them on in private much as their fans do publicly. Of course, other benefits typical to cheerleaders might also play a part in that pattern.
An ABC News report estimated that among celebrity marriages in Hollywood, only a third would actually last. For us commoners, it’s a fifty-fifty coin toss. Is it all that surprising their numbers would be off given the added baggage involved? Wonder what the success rate is for serial killers?
Will King is a television and media critic who splits his time as a stand up comic. He collects conspiracy theories and claims to have invented Teflon. In his spare time he follows presidential politics and all traffic signs. He lives in Charlotte, NC.
Selma: You got to be kidding me, maybe it’s the circle I run with but nobody I know would chase a celebrity in hopes of finding romance. The chances are slim to none, closer to none. If you are in love with a celebrity, take my advice and just give up because it’s never going to happen. Just make sure the person you are with loves you as much as you love them. Play this DiscoveryGame to make sure you are on the same wave length.
Giulia: Whether it’s to drugs, alcohol, or something less traditional like fame or attention, it seems every celeb is addicted to one thing or another. I recommend this DiscoveryGame to anyone who is, or wanting to, date a celebrity. Addiction is real and it does become other peoples burden.
