…Double-As? For what purpose, pray tell?
Listen up, ladies. We’re talking to you this time… in hopes you’ll talk to your man, later. A study unveiled at the second annual Women’s Sexual Health State-of-the-Art Series conference in conjunction with the Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine, may change the way you think, feel and talk about… sex toys.
Among other remarkable findings from this breakthrough study, researchers found that – apparently – lots of us use “devices.” In fact, in a week’s time, one in five women reported using self-stimulation to achieve pleasure. Of those, nearly 60 percent use a sexual device to help things out.
All in all, the study revealed that a whopping 44 percent of women between the ages of 18 and 60 have used a sexual device. (Sssshhh. You can call it a sex “toy.” We won’t tell. They are brought out during playtime, after all.)
Little, Humming Friends and… Happiness?
The author of this rather benchmark study suggests a connection between the use of sexual devices with overall quality of life. Here’s why: Women who reported using sexual devices also reported experiencing higher levels of sexual function and overall satisfaction with their partners than non-users of the little battery-operated buggers. (Keep reading and the word “bugger” used here may leave you blushing – if not sniggering – at the little pleasure-focused pun.) According to the study, the “satisfaction” that was increased by users of devices includes:
- Higher levels of sexual desire
- Higher levels of arousal
- Less pain during sexy-time with your partner
- Less pain after sexy-time with your partner
Sexual device users also find it easier to reach that perfectly-punctuated-pinnacle (you know – “the BIG O”) when compared to non-users. Put simply, those who invited battery-operated buddies into the sexy-scene with their partners (as well as alone), had an overall happier time of things, at least as far as sex is concerned. And let’s face it. Sex (whether it’s good, bad or ugly) has a huge impact on our day-to-day moods and experiences, not to mention our relationships.
Feeling Funny about Involving your Man?
You’re not alone. In fact, a study conducted at Indiana University might help you to consider… he just might like it. In the study that polled over 3,000 Americans ages 18 to 60, the idea that vibrators are intimidating to women’s sexual partners just isn’t so. Lots of women perceived that the idea that using a sexual device would be upsetting to their partners. However, 70 percent of men stepped up to say they had no problem whatsoever with the buzzing sex toys.
In fact, some say it is actually imperative that – one way or another – a woman be a little primed for optimum results. As darling as she is brilliant, OB/Gyn – Dr. Lisa Masterson, from hit daytime showThe Doctors, advises men out there, “You have got to warm up the engines, guys. If you want that lady to purrrrr, you’ve got to warm her up!” And, as the IU study confirms, they won’t mind doing so.
What about… the 80 Percent?
While the State-of-the-Art Series study revealed that one in five women admitted to dabbling with self-stimulation, that leaves 4 out of every 5 of us out of a very important loop! First, we’ve got to somehow become comfortable with the idea that it’s not icky to feel pleasure down there. Then, we’ve got to come to grips with the fact that there are a whole lot of benefits that can come from spending time with ourselves in the sexy way. Finally, we’ve got to make our peace with the fact that toys can make the down-there touching a whole lot of fun. If you’ve never considered this, it may take a little getting used to before you’re sold. That’s okay. While you’re contemplating if a little experimenting might be right for you, also consider this: The American Medical Association points out that orgasm, aside from being AWESOME…
- Relieves tension
- Helps you sleep better
- Calms junk food (and sometimes cigarette) cravings
- Burns calories
- Can work as natural pain management
Where to Start…
The very first place to start is getting comfortable with yourself, your sexuality, and your body. If you’ve never touched yourself manually, chances are you’re not going to want to purchase a sex toy on Friday afternoon and hop with your honey into the sack with it on Friday night. If you’ve never taken time with yourself, start there. You’ll probably be surprised how much fun you’ll have and how empowering it can be to (literally) be “in touch with yourself.”
- The Berman Lina Vibrating Pen. One purchaser described it as “a surprisingly intense, high frequency vibrator.” It is a discreet-looking little pseudo-pen, with a “high grade tickler sleeve and vibrating nodes.”
- Mini Max vibrating lipstick. Also exquisitely discreet.
- Lady Bug Vibrator. Admit it. It’s just kind of cute to have a sexy-time toy that you can refer to as “the ladybug.”
This should get you started. But we can’t emphasize enough, before you can enjoy the wonderful benefits of orgasm, sexual empowerment, and enhanced sexual escapades with your honeylove, you first have to be ready and willing to place your sexuality as a priority. Once you’ve gotten to where you need to be mentally, the physical part will be a whole lot easier to explore. Literally.
Amie Martin is a master-level social worker, freelance writer, and mom/stepmom to five wonderful, quirky, interesting children.