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Guest Writers

By : Karen Hendry

Dear Mothers-in-Law,

We are so glad to have married your sons.  They are the love of our lives.  However, we are not so sure we are glad to have gotten you in the bargain.  Seriously, we are sure you must think we are children, that we have never kept a house before, and that we don’t know your son, his needs and desires, at all.  Seriously, we didn’t just meet yesterday and it’s not like we didn’t live together before we got married (ooops, you knew about that, right?).  For your information, we have a college education, we have jobs, and we know how to do our laundry and wash the floors. 

So, with all of this laid at your feet, tell us why you feel the need to show up at our homes and start going on and on and ON and nagging us about how things are not right.  The floor is never clean enough, the bathroom is never shiny enough, and god forbid you should catch us not separating our laundry properly.  Here is a news flash for you: your way isn’t the only way and it isn’t always right!  We are almost afraid to have children because you’ll be forever meddling in their lives and telling us how to raise them.  Is that what you want, to have no grandchildren because we are too afraid to deal with you after they are born?

So here is the deal.  You keep your opinions, comments, criticisms, and advice to yourself. OK?  If we want to know, if we want your input, then we will ask for it.  It’s that simple.  If we want it, then we’ll ask. If we don’t, then you keep your mouth shut.  Did you know that in Italy, a marriage is more likely to succeed for every hundred yards a mother-in-law lives away from the married couple’s home?  Maybe we should try that, don’t you think?  Think about your mother-in-law.  How did you feel about her meddling in your life?  You may have tolerated it and in your day it might have even been acceptable for her to do so, but it isn’t now.

Look, we want to have a relationship with you, we want to “get along”, for the sake of the men we love.  Just remember that you aren’t the only woman in his life anymore and you aren’t his caretaker anymore.  In fact, we’re not his caretaker either.  We are partners in life and we are ready to journey through life together.  Please, don’t make bumps in our road.  We don’t want to crash.  We are sure there are times when your help will be appreciated, just wait until you are asked and if you want to offer, take a “no” answer gracefully.  If you can remember this, then we should all encounter smooth sailing.  And please, don’t ever show up at our door unannounced.

Sincerely,

The Wives
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A Hard Day to Step Up
Letters to Daughter-in-Law
Mamma Mia!