Hollywood’s Dirty Laundry: Tokii puts Celebrity love lives through the Ringer It’s easy to feel smug when things go pear-shaped for celebrities. After all, they’re rich, beautiful and fawned over by everyone they meet – why shouldn’t life rake them through the coals once in a while? Fair as it may seem, it’s easy to forget that celebrities are people too and that things like divorce, betrayal and heartbreak hurt, no matter what you do for a living. The trick is to contextualize these famous relationships and see where, in this moving cast of characters, we can learn a thing or two about our comparatively regular lives. With that in mind, Tokii’s spending the week looking at Celebrities, the love they share and the mischief that they get up to. Love ‘em or hate ‘em, we all get a kick out of watching celebrities live in the spotlight. Everyone is buzzing about the TomKat split, but what was the true reason for their separation? Steve weighs in on the A-list couple’s imminent divorce and tells it like it is: Hollywood is all about keeping up appearances and has very little to do with making real lasting relationships! LEONARDO DICAPRIO’S MODEL CHOICE Some guys get all the breaks. Let’s talk about the long string of bikini models that have attached themselves to Leo’s arm over the last two decades. Do you think he has a “type” or what? POOR JOHN MAYER; STUMBLING OVER HIS OWN TITANIC EGO? How long can a guy kiss some of the hottest girls in show business, tell anybody who’ll listen about all of the intimate details and still be a class act? Not long… CLOONEY’S ANGELS: IS GEORGE DESTINED FOR ETERNAL BACHELORHOOD…? Why buy the cow when you can get all of the milk in the world for free? Is Dr. Ross living the dream, or does serial bachelorhood get old after a good 20 years on the A-list? ASHTON & MILA… FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS? They’re the two biggest stars to come out of “That Seventies Show” and they’ve both come out of the weirdest relationships in the world. They have all of this in common, plus they’re two of the hottest people on the planet. They HAVE to be hooking up, right? COUGARTOWN: FEMALE CELEBRITIES ON THE PROWL Life starts at 40, and with this new wave of wealthy, horny Hollywood gals with personal trainers and plastic surgeons on speed-dial, those California Boy toys will never know what hit ‘em. HEY, SIMON COWELL – IS BRITNEY YOUR NEW PAULA? A strong drink without a smooth chaser is only fit for drunks in shady bars, and Simon Cowell is about as strong as they come. He needs a nice girl to balance him out- someone who’s been in the celebrity trenches and lived to sing about it. Someone who is pretty but vulnerable and who is just scary enough to keep Simon in check. He needs Britney Spears. J-LOVE GOES FISHING FOR LEVINE AND COMES UP SHORT Celebrities don’t usually have a problem hooking up, but they aren’t immune to the odd Social Media snafu. Jennifer Love-Hewitt makes a play for the fella who’s got moves like Jagger and comes up extremely short. RYAN REYNOLDS AND BLAKE LIVELY; TAKING THE NEXT STEPS… One’s a recent divorcee with a string of duds to his name, the other is an up-and-coming it girl who’s ready to explode. Mr. Reynolds better put a ring on it before his six-pack turns 40. If you were a gazillionaire champion thespian splitting your time between Hollywood and life as an aristocrat in the French Countryside, would you have time to steer your marriage through a rough patch? TOM AND KATIE: MISSION IMPOSSIBLE So much for all that. TomKat is officially no more and the rumors are flying faster than Chuck Yeager’s dentures. Was it his religion? Was it her father? How does Suri’s outfit never ever get messy? We may never know, but you can bet your last dollar that Oprah’s couches will be taking a beating any day now. WHY WON’T HE JUST ASK? HOW CELEBRITIES SHARE OUR PLIGHT Ryan Seacrest pulls a live TV fake proposal gag that draws the ire of every woman in the world… Except the butt of his joke. Is Julianne Hough the most patient woman alive? Or is Ryan Seacrest on borrowed time? Until next time,
Karla Stephens-Tolstoy |
